I have been doing the no refined sugar thing for a few months now, and I woke up this morning with a puffy face, headache and a sore throat. Big night? Well, not exactly. I ate a hot cross bun over the Easter long weekend.
I’m a little bit precious these days. When I was 18, I would sometimes stay out so late that I would pass people on their morning commute as I was heading home. Their morning coffee, briefcases and fresh faces met my sequinned dress, smudged eyeliner and ratty hair extensions. I was never interested in drinking. When I went out, I was fuelled only by punk-pop tunes and a Hungry Jack’s dinner. I was blissfully unaware of what refined sugar, oils and saturated fats could do to my health. It was a beautiful time. Now, I can’t eat a hot cross bun without my body punishing me. And the only Easter eggs I can stomach are Taylor Swift Easter eggs.
Speaking of, I’ve been trying to avoid The Eras Tour footage as I want to have some element of surprise for when I go to the concert, but it is so damn hard to resist. I’m like a moth to a flame, a rabbit to a carrot, Taylor Swift to revenge. I’ve been withholding the concert videos from Tim, telling him that I can’t save myself but I can still save him. I had a colleague tell me that her Explore Feed on Instagram is full of Taylor Swift videos liked by me. Since then, I’ve been manically liking videos to influence her algorithm.
I was first introduced to Taylor Swift by my Dad. He would often discover new artists online and upload their songs to my iPod. Many of the artists he discovered never hit the big time, except this country singer named Taylor. All the way back in 2006, I had read in a magazine that she was “Like Avril…but country!” alongside a picture of her with ringlet curls, squinted eyes and the most perfect cupids bow. I was sold.
Taylor is only a few years older than me so I feel like I was able to grow up with her and her music. Taylor’s songs have been the soundtrack to the ups, downs and in-betweens of my life. Her wins and losses have often taught me valuable life lessons. She was always a few steps ahead of me, unintentionally guiding me like a big sister would. Now, with her re-recordings, a whole new generation can have the same thing. I’m so excited about the Eras Tour but I’m equally as grateful I was able to experience these eras in real time. I was deciphering Taylor’s Easter eggs before they were even called Easter eggs. And more importantly, I was rooting for her when it wasn’t cool to like Taylor Swift. Yeah, I have a chip on my shoulder and am wanting to pee all over my deserved spot in the Swiftie community. I act like a fed up parent when I hear people getting their Swiftie history wrong. I’ll sit down, light an invisible cigarette and say “Okay, now you better listen to me, kid” before giving them some much needed tough love.
In honour of The Eras Tour, I thought it would be fun to rank my favourite Taylor Swift eras. I’m very arrogant and have strong opinions when it comes to this stuff. I welcome your input but please proceed with caution. I’m prepared to get into fights over this. Speak Now or forever hold your peace.
I’ve decided to break it up into multiple parts otherwise this article will be longer than 13x All Too Well 10 minute versions. Here goes!
1. Speak Now
My Dad recently found my old Speak Now CD. The disc was scratched. The liner notes crinkled, worn and most likely covered in tears from my 17 year old self. Speak Now came out the year I graduated high school and followed me to university. A time filled with confusion, change and challenges. That album felt like a big sister sharing her diary with me. A sleepover where everybody was invited. A place where a sensitive, introspective, emotional girl like myself could wallow, get angry and find peace. I have vivid memories of dancing around my room to Enchanted, long before TikTok ever existed and the track went viral. Let’s be honest, Taylor wrote a better song for Owl City than she ever did for Joe Alwyn. The guitar slide, the dreamy production, the lyrics that perfectly capture the magical feeling of meeting someone new. When the longing, the fantasy and the pain of losing someone you never really had is more appealing than the guy himself.
The more I think about it, Speak Now is basically Taylor’s personal Burn Book. This album was written solely by Taylor, with no co-writers. It is probably her most autobiographical album. It was around this time that the media started to turn on Taylor. Criticising her for writing songs about her life and the people in it. I think people have a hard time wrapping their head around women who are multi-faceted. Some of y’all are just Mean. And what about the whole don’t-date-Taylor-Swift-or-she-will-write-a-song-about-you bullshit? Men should consider themselves lucky to have Taylor Swift write a song about them.
On this album, Taylor proved she had a perspective far beyond her years, with songs about forgiveness, growing up, rising above criticism and moving on from heartbreak. Other songs reminded us that she was, in fact, your average teenage girl. Don’t even get me started with Better Than Revenge. It’s a blatant Misery Business rip-off but I love it just the same. I have to put my feminism in a box and throw away the key every time I rock out to it. I feel like a lot of people don’t know that when Taylor sings “Show me how much better you are” she is referencing Much Better by The Jonas Brothers, a song written about Camilla Belle (The girl better known for the things that she does on the mattress). In a 2014 interview Taylor said:
I was 18 when I wrote that. That’s the age you are when you think someone can actually take your boyfriend. Then you grow up and realise no one take someone from you if they don’t want to leave.
Taylor is an equal-opportunist as she also goes for John Mayer’s neck on this album, with Dear John, which I think is one of her best written songs ever. At 19 years old, I was making balloon animals for kids at a Bunnings Warehouse carpark. At 19 years old, Taylor was shining like fireworks over John Mayer’s sad empty town.
In March of 2012, the Speak Now World Tour came to Sydney and I didn’t have tickets. You can imagine my excitement when some floor tickets miraculously became available on the day before the concert. I bought two tickets, one for me and one for my sister Melissa, with the money I had earned working part-time at Bunnings Warehouse. The only problem was: I had work the next day. I knew I needed to take matters into my own hands. I decided to commit to my role as ‘the girl too sick to work’. I went to work without any makeup on. It was a humbling experience. “Kayla, you look really pale. Are you feeling okay?” my manager said. “I feel dizzy…but I don’t want to let the team down” I said using all of the acting skills I learned during my 2 day NIDA acting course, coughing and shivering in between pauses in conversation. Well, look out Cate Blanchett because I was out of there by midday. I had more than enough time to get ready, catch the train to the arena and line up. I went on to have one of the best nights of my entire life.
Melissa and I lined up for hours and fought for our spot front row of the standing area. I remember holding her hand as we ran through the crowd, strategically finding the best spot based off the stage design I had studied beforehand. I wore a red dress to the concert, with a matching red lipstick and curled hair. Taylor started the show with Sparks Fly. She was able to captivate the audience with a simple look to the side and a grin. Taylor sported straightened hair with front bangs, which signified a new era was emerging amid the Speak Now era. Taylor had already been on the road for over a year before she headed down under. I had purchased the Speak Now World Tour Live album ahead of the concert, so I had every transition memorised, but that didn’t make it any less special. I remember swiftly singing along to the Back to December/Apologize mashup with ease, while other people looked at me with confusion. Later in the show, a teenage girl yelled out “I love you, Taylor!” during Taylor’s acoustic rendition of Fifteen. Taylor said “I love you too… whoever that was!”. Everyone around the girl started to congratulate her. “You’re so lucky!” someone said to her as she wiped away her tears. We were so close I could see the hairs on Taylor’s arm. As Taylor walked through the crowd to the smaller stage, she grabbed my hand. Her hand touched my hand only for a second. A moment in time Taylor has never thought about again. A moment in time I will be talking about in the retirement home. I remember how soft her skin was and wondering what body lotion she uses. Of course, I couldn’t post about any of this on Facebook because I had gone home sick from work. I only took one crappy iPhone 4 photo the whole concert. I later added one of the first Instagram filters X Pro II to it. The filter now a time stamp of a simpler time.
Taylor needs to release Speak Now (Taylor’s Version) so I won’t go to Swiftie jail for listening to the original recordings.
2. Fearless
In 2009, I posted Fearless lyrics to my Facebook status.
You’re just so cool, run your hands through your hair, absentmindedly making me want you.
It was the modern day love note. I had posted these lyrics in a not-so-subtle attempt at getting my crush’s attention - and it worked! My crush had liked my status almost immediately which led me to believe he was obsessed with me. It was that kind of misguided confidence and delusion that allowed this album to become the soundtrack to my later teens. I remember singing along to You Belong With Me as it was playing over the speakers at my local Boost Juice. My enthusiasm was met with eye-rolls from my friends who were into Paramore and My Chemical Romance at the time.
Taylor gave a voice to the girls who grew up on rom-coms and were attached to the idea of happy endings, but dealing with the real-life disappointment and heartache that goes along with believing in them. I don’t actually think my crush ever promised me Forever & Always, but that didn’t stop me from dancing around my room to it in a wild rage when he inevitably disappointed me.
I don’t mean to brag but I was actually fifteen when I heard Fifteen for the first time. The song was a cautionary tale of sorts but I had latched onto lyrics like “All you wanted was to be wanted” as opposed to listening to Taylor’s sisterly advice.
I had developed an unhinged infatuation with the Jonas Brothers around this time. When my first boyfriend broke up with me on Valentine’s Day, my Mum gifted me a Camp Rock blanket for me to wrap myself in. The blanket made the whole ordeal worth it. You may think that Taylor dating Joe Jonas, my favourite Jonas Brother, would’ve made teenage me hate her, but it only made me idolise her more.
During their relationship, Taylor had written in her Myspace bio a description of her Prince Charming, which seemed to be a nod to her boyfriend Joe Jonas:
I’m also the girl who still believes Prince Charming exists somewhere out there - fully equipped with great hair and an immature sense of humour.
You can imagine my shock when Taylor confirmed their break up by crossing out the part in her bio about Joe (2008 was truly a dramatic, chaotic and delightful time to be a teenage girl). This was followed up by Taylor officially launching her album Fearless on The Ellen Show. The interview took a dramatic turn when Taylor noted she was no longer with Joe Jonas, declaring he had broken up with her over the phone. You could tell her heart was pounding as she said it while simultaneously seething with anger. The good-girl conditioning blended with female teen-angst was an interesting combination, a combination I was also familiar with. I was Team Taylor. If my boyfriend broke up with me in a 27 second phone call, I would go on Ellen and tell everyone about it too.
I went to the Fearless Tour when it came to Sydney in 2010 with my Mum and two younger sisters. I wore my heels that I had from my year 10 formal and later regretted it when everyone else was wearing cowboy boots. I was unintentionally cosplaying as the other girl from the You Belong With Me music video by wearing high heels instead of sneakers. When Taylor emerged from the bottom of the stage, dressed in a marching band ensemble, my eyes widened. I could hardly process everything that was going on. She started singing the chorus of You Belong With Me with green glittery eyes and her signature curly hair and red lipstick. In between songs, Taylor would pause to soak in the crowd’s applause, which only encouraged the crowd to cheer louder and louder. I remember it was the first concert I had been to where the audience stomped on the ground to show their enthusiasm. The movie Valentines Day had recently come out which Taylor starred in, so she sang her song Today Was a Fairytale from the soundtrack. Ahead of starting the song, she said something about her no longer looking for Mr. Right, but instead looking for Mr. Right Now. I thought that was so profound and was completely unaware she was quoting the movie The Sweetest Thing. There were many things that happened organically during the concert that are now seen as trademarks of the Fearless era: Taylor using her hands to create a heart shape to show her gratitude to the crowd. Spinning around with her guitar. The number 13. Sparkly dresses, cowboy boots and curly hair.
Fearless went on to win several awards, including Album of The Year at the Grammys in 2010. Kanye infamously interrupted Taylor’s acceptance speech for Video of The Year at the 2009 MTV Video Music Awards. I’m sure you know the rest. I remember commenting on a friends Facebook status when they posted about what would go on to be a defining pop culture moment:
OMG what happened??????
One person commented that I should learn to use Google, which was fair. My friend was kind enough to explain to me what went on.
Kanye is a jerk!!! we concluded.
I texted a friend, a fellow Swiftie, when Fearless (Taylor’s Version) was released. He said “I can hear her smiling as she’s singing these songs” and I couldn’t help but smile as I listened along. Each track taking me back to a time I feel so far away from now. The album is the perfect blend of classic storytelling and anthems you want to scream at the top of your lungs. Fearless (Taylor’s Version) feels like finding an old box of journals from your youth, filled with glitter gel pen handwriting and declarations of love. When you’re old enough to not cringe at your younger self, but instead appreciate them for all their bravery, youthful optimism and blissful naivety. The version of you before the uncomplicated got complicated. The version of you that would Jump Then Fall. The version of you that would dance in a storm in your best dress Fearless.
~
Speak Now or forever hold your peace.
As someone who has unwittingly gotten Taylor as my #1 Spotify artist 3 years in a row, I can’t tell you how much I enjoyed this sprawling voyage through the eras through your sparkling teenage eyes 🥹✨🌼 THANK YOU! Brilliant, witty, evocative writing. I’m a fan!!!
Did I inspire this post 🤔