My Saturn Has Returned
Kacey Musgraves — Deeper Well, reflections & current obsessions.
“In my mind, we’re in New York, you had never been before, but baby, now it’s our town” Kacey sings on Too Good to be True, from her latest album Deeper Well.
I can’t help but think about November of 2022 — Tim and I were visiting New York City, staying on St Marks Place in the East Village. Picture: Layers of denim and corduroy, bagels with tofu cream cheese, autumn leaves, the smell of weed, people-watching in Washington Square Park, sipping coffee from Porto Rico.
The music playing loudly from the street had become our unofficial East Village soundtrack. Hearing our neighbours’ conversations through the air vent in our bathroom felt a part of our morning routine — “This ass isn’t going to slap itself” we heard a woman say, followed by the sound of hand to cheek. The crisp morning air, the exposed brick and hardwood floors in our Air Bnb apartment, Insomnia Cookies from around the corner fresh and warm out of the oven. It felt magical to be there. Travelling after the pandemic, and finally retuning to some normalcy, as well as opening ourselves up to possibility.
I’ve told this story before, so please indulge me as I tell it again, now with some distance and perspective.
On one of our first days in the East Village, Tim and I were walking up our street, when I recognised a man (which was surprising given I don’t know anyone in New York City). I quickly realised it was Kacey Musgraves’ boyfriend, who I had seen pictures of on her Instagram. Holding onto his arm was a woman wearing 60s inspired round-shaped sunglasses and a beanie on top of long straightened hair. It was Kacey Musgraves — the same artist who I had listened to when taking off on the plane from Sydney. Before I knew it, she disappeared into the distance. I considered running ahead and asking her for a photo, but Tim encouraged me to leave her alone (I’m thirsty, and he keeps me hydrated).
The only reason we were there at that time, was because I needed to use the bathroom and our apartment was close enough to drop into.
🎼 Does it happen by chance? Is it all happenstance? Do we get any say in this mess?
I have a feeling the universe wanted this to happen. A higher power encouraged me to drink that large coffee on an empty stomach. The universe conspired to have me shovel down a tofu cream cheese smothered bagel. The stars worked together to make Kacey’s and my schedules align (I think all the sage I burn is melting my brain).
🎼 This life that we make, is it random or fate? Can I speak to the architect?
Anyway, it is funny to think that Kacey was likely writing this album, during her time in New York City while Tim and I were there. I have since learned that Kacey was staying in Greenwich Village, and recording her album at the iconic Electric Studios, spending a lot of her spare time in Washington Square Park.
“New York City, one of the biggest cities on the face of the planet, and a place that, ironically, I was able to find a slower, warmer, more open sound” Kacey said during her Apple Music Live performance released this month. “Emotions are magnified here. Even just walking thirty seconds down the street, you’re hit with every culture, sight, smell, and sound possible” she continued, and I couldn’t help but assume that she penned this ode to a certain stunning brunette she saw on St Marks Place on the 29th of October 2022 (to be exact).
Deeper Well has been on high rotation for me since it was released in March. I’m 31, and I feel like you kind of have to be over 30 to fully understand the vulnerability behind the lyrics “Please don’t make me regret, opening up that part of myself, that I’ve been scared to give again” (Too Good to be True). You also need to have survived your Saturn return before you are allowed to sing along to songs about it, right? (You can have your collagen, let the rest of us have this album).
It has already accompanied me on road trips, played through my headphones and home speakers, kept me company on lunch break walks. It is the current album that I press play on without thinking — it is easy-listening at its finest, but when listened to intently, you realise it is a deeply profound album.
Deeper Well is the older and wiser sister of Golden Hour. It’s an album about finding comfort in a new relationship, and eventually finding peace within yourself. Kacey is first and foremost an observer — appreciative of the little things, the small in-between moments, and the wonders of the universe: Jade stones, good omens, palm trees in the wind, the layers and ruffles in pink champagne cake, accidentally caught sunrises.
Kacey has gone inwards, and opted for healing and introspection, over a scathing breakup album — she isn’t pointing the finger, she’s looking in the mirror. “My Saturn has returned” Kacey sings on the title track. I’m no astrologer, but I do dabble when I feel like blaming my personality defects on my horoscope. From what I understand, the Saturn return finds someone in their late 20s, shedding light on their shadows — zeroing in on wounds that need to be healed and lessons that need to be learned. At 35, Kacey has found herself in a grounded, enlightened and peaceful place. The album isn’t annoying therapy-speak though, and you won’t need to know your rising sign to understand it. Deeper Well is a commentary on the human condition: what makes us tick, what makes us afraid (“It’s our nature to look out for each other” — Heart of the Woods).
This album has a disarming sincerity, with soothing reassurance that everything will be okay (“If the train is meant for me, it won’t leave the station” — Nothing to be Scared Of). Its strength is in its simplicity — because just like when we return home to ourselves, we feel the simple truths in our bones. We find ourselves connecting to cliche sayings on magnets (you’re right, I really should believe in myself), being in awe of nature and the wonders of the universe, and saying crazy things like: the money and the diamonds and the things that shine can’t buy you true happiness.
Deeper Well is the desire to press pause of life’s precious moments. It’s herbal tea with lemon and honey. It’s looking at the person you love with Anime Eyes. It’s intimate convos that go way into the night. It’s reaching the top of a mountain and opting to enjoy the view, before moving onto the next.
During her Apple Music Live performance, Kacey ad-libs “So I thought, but I was wrong” onto “He loves me in all the ways that I’ve never felt love before” from Dinner with Friends — a track full of delightful observations and things she declares she would miss from the other side. The unexpected lyrical addition didn’t soften the tracks impact, but served as a reminder of how just as one season moves in, another moves on.
On High Rotation:
Vampire Weekend — Only God Was Above Us
Taylor Swift — The Tortured Poets Department
MGMT — Loss of Life
Current Obsessions:
Diane Keaton — Tim and I have been watching heaps of films since we got our new TV. Tim is our movie curator. Whenever he asks me what I feel like watching, I reply with “80s, 90s, New York, female lead…you know what I like” and he will find something to fit the brief. We have watched everything written by Nancy Myers (I love me some middle aged rich people drama). I have since grown very fond of Diane Keaton: the turtleneck queen (Baby Boom, Something’s Gotta Give, Annie Hall). Now, I believe that she could be a rich playwright, I believe that a relationship with a man who dated her own daughter could work… but who the hell chooses Jack Nicolson over Keanu Reeves? That’s where I draw the line.
Monk — This show was a family favourite growing up, so it has been nostalgic to revisit. When Monk says “Here’s what happened” I levitate.
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